You are not alone if some days you wish that you could run away from everything and take with you only the small selection of people that you’ve allowed into the tiniest, softest, most vulnerable and breakable sections of your heart. You are not alone if a life free from fear and doubt and sadness seems like an impossibility. You’re not alone if you want this impossibility to become a reality more than anything else in the world, and you’re also not alone if you don’t even care about the impossibility and you just want everything to stop.
But the thing that you really need to remember, the thing that you need to try and hold onto on the darkest and hardest days, and the cliché which you’re probably tired of hearing but which is so, so true and can save lives, is that you are not alone. And that as painful as it sounds, as painful as you might find it, when people open their hearts they can get better.
Please, please, be brave and reach out and talk to someone. You are loved by many more people than you know. A part of the world, no matter how small, is better because you are in it. Communication and love are two of the most important and powerful weapons that you can use in this battle. The strength to keep going can be so hard to find, but please know that it can get better and one day, if you keep fighting, you will look at the world and be stronger because of the challenges that tried to break you but ended up, in a way, building you. You will look back and you will not recognise the person you once were. Or rather, you’ll recognise them because the bravery you had to summon to stop being that person will be wrapped tight around your heart, but you’ll be filled with gratitude that you no longer have to be that person. You will feel so free and brave and strong and loved and able to love again.
Life does get better. And the moments when you just want everything to stop, to get off the world and run away, they don’t last forever. I promise you, that if you can dig deeper than you ever thought you would, than you ever thought you could, it will get better. It will get brighter. You will be okay, you will find reasons to smile again, and you will wake up with a sense of purpose and a feeling of joy that you can love and be loved. You will have the walls you built slowly taken down and rebuilt with places for the sun to shine through.
Meggie Dennis (@_meggie_rose_)